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Food of the Gods

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  Food of the Gods (1976) The Plot: An unknown substance causes the animals of a remote island to grow to giant proportions and terrorize the populace Morgan was just a professional football player looking for a weekend retreat with his buddies to a remote Island in Canada. What he didn't expect was the giant rats! Which left him at a serious disadvantage when the giant rats attacked. If he had only known about the giant rat infestation beforehand he could prepare with a stockpile of cheese perhaps. The travel agency brochure definitely left the part out about the giant rats. What's the matter, Morgan? Chicken! That was the hand Morgan was dealt. But it wasn't just the rats, there were also giant wasps, giant worms and giant chickens, which on the surface giant chickens do not seem so threatening, but just you wait until you are stuck in a confined space with a 7 foot tall rooster with a bad attitude!  Hey! Got any Camembert? Morgan was not on his own however, he was stuck

Primal Rage

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  Primal Rage (1988) The Plot: A journalist investigating a scientist experimenting on brain cells of baboons accidentally gets bitten by the baboon and infected with a virus that turns him into a rage induced killing machine. It's the late 80s at a Florida university. The corporation is about to cut funding to the baboon experiments unless results could be produced. A young moped driving college journalist senses something amiss and is on the case. He unfortunately tells his self professed "gonzo journalist" about this who breaks in and gets infected with the baboon rage virus and sets a world of pain in motion. Never trust a self professed gonzo journalist I think is the moral of this movie. Sure, he thinks he may be Hunter S. Thompson, all edgy with his 3 day beard and dangling earring and chain smoking Marlboros. But in reality, he did let himself get bitten by a rage virus infected baboon. Turns out he was more like Nick, Mallory's boyfriend on Family Ties than h

The Devil Bat

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  The Devil Bat (1940) The Plot: An aggrieved scientist, angry that his contributions to the success of the perfume company he works for, devises a plan to kill his enemies. You can't really go wrong with a horror movie starring Bela Legosi. He just has that look. And here in Devil Bat he plays a mad scientist of sorts. A perfume chemist and medical doctor by trade, hey! Bela is a hard working, motivated man! He is really upset at being denied his proper due. So what does he do? What any sane man would do. Why he devises a method to grow hideously large bats, of course, using electricity, natch! Just a man in his workshop with an electrified bat As if hideously large bats were not enough, he then invents a perfume that will attract the hideously large bats who will attack the jugular veins of whomever is wearing the perfume. It's the perfect crime! He keeps the bats in his attic store room, which was suspiciously clean of guano. I don't know much about bats but I do know th

Audrey Rose

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  Audrey Rose (1977) The Plot: An 11 year old girl holds the reincarnated soul of Anthony Hopkins deceased daughter. Audrey Rose is definitely a unique movie, starting off charting very familiar Exorcist territory before veering off into courtroom drama and ending on hypnotism induced death. Even by 70s standards it is way out there. It follows the life of Ivy Templeton normal 11 year old girl, or is she? Anthony Hopkins shows up and starts stalking the family until the finally agree to meet him, over tea no less. Well, he is British after all. He explains that her parents that because Audrey was born minutes after his daughter was killed, she now holds the reincarnated soul of his dead daughter. What other explanation could there be? If you can't get Linda Blair, you get Ivy Templeton instead It is at this point that Ivy begins to behave strangely, going into trances, burning her hands on cold surfaces, doing very Linda Blair type stuff, minus pea soup vomit, thankfully. The famil

Urban Legend

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  Urban Legend (1998) The Plot: A serial killer commits murders that match urban legends.  The 1990s when the internet was still young and things like urban legends would spread through word of mouth with no way to really verify them or not. How naive we all were back then, little did we know that urban legends would just morph into modern day conspiracy theories spread baselessly through social media. Pop rocks and soda? no thanks! That's how Mikey died! Urban Legend has Freddy Krueger himself (Robert Englund) as a professor of folklore at a New England University teaching our students, er, victims, all about urban legends. Then he disappears for most of the movie until he winds up dead in a trunk of a car. Seems woefully underutilized here honestly. if you are a 90s horror movie(and a slasher movie to boot) and Robert Englund is int he cast and he has like 10 minutes of screen time, you may want to re-evaluate things. Didn't check the backseat before getting int he car, eh? H

Terror At London Bridge

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  Terror At London Bridge (1985) The Plot: Jack the Ripper returns to kill again in 1985 Arizona David Hasselhoff is a former Chicago cop who once killed an unarmed teen while on duty and was looking for a new start in a quiet town, so he becomes a cop in Lake Havasu Arizona which recently is having the last piece of the original London Bridge installed on its version which was built brick by brick from the original. When that happens, it somehow brought Jack the Ripper back to life. It's not really explained how. Usually, these types of movies will have some sort of scientist or paranormal expert to spout technobabble to make this make sense, but not here!  The Hunter/Knight Rider crossover we missed but surely deserved Hassehoff is helped by a great totally 80s supporting cast, Dee Dee McCall from Hunter, Roy from Emergency, Clu Galager as his boss and Adrienne Barbeau! He does decent detective work here, but I can't help but wonder why this couldn't have just been a Knig

The Horror Show

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  The Horror Show (1989) The Plot: A death row inmate is executed in an electric chair but it releases his spirit which haunts the detective who put him away.  The Horror Show is basically Nightmare on Elm Street with Brion James playing the Robert Englund role. He is a cop killer who in order to cheat death and somehow get his spirit to another dimension actually built a home made electric chair for himself in order to build up immunity to the electric charge. Just sheer brilliance from Brion James here. Got to love his bold thinking and planning,  He is really getting a charge over this His original thinking doesn't stop there or with death even. He finds unique ways to haunt lance Henrikson and family. One particularly inventive way was to warp himself into the Thanksgiving turkey. You really haven't lived until you have seen a cooked turkey with Brion James' face on it. I will think of this scene fondly come Thanksgiving.  Nothing to see here. Just a cooked turkey with